Sunday, March 11, 2018

Breakfast Sandwich Porn (THE RETURN): When New Jersey Met Yemen

The sandwich. Gaze upon it. (also, go birds)
Photo Credit: TH
Do you see the above picture? That, my friends, is perfection in breakfast sandwich form. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but honestly, whenever I make a breakfast sandwich, something askew always makes its way into my technique. The bacon is either under or, god forbid, overcooked. I mess up the eggs. The bread gets a scorch on it. I put too much sauce, hot or otherwise, on and it becomes a gooey, slippery faux pas. But this morning, I got it completely right, and my god, the results were as delicious as the technique. Oh, I'm sorry, I haven't described what's on that sesame seed bagel yet.

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

TH Cooks: Sausage Leek Dressing/Stuffing

Pro-Tip: Don't let the broiler get away from you or else you'll get some black spots on the bread. It's still really good though.
Photo Credit: TH
I posted this recipe back when Holzerman Hungers was on Tumblr, but it's a Thanksgiving staple here at the ol' homestead. Stuffing, or dressing if you're making it separate and not stuffing it in the bird, is a must on any Thanksgiving plate. When I was younger and spent Thanksgiving with my family, we used to have two stuffings/dressings on the table, one with potatoes and one with sausage. In addition to being super-starchy, the potato stuffing was usually bland. The sausage stuffing, however, was the best thing on the table most of the time. However, when I got engaged, I started eating Thanksgiving with Amanda's family. Their stuffing contains livers and giblets and other pieces of offal. I respect the dedication to using all the turkey, but it's just not my bag. So in order to have stuffing on my plate on Thanksgiving, I started making my own when we got married and started hosting it at our house.

Monday, August 14, 2017

Piccini: Ocean City, NJ

One hell of a pie
Photo Credit: TH
What: Piccini Wood Fired Brick Oven Pizza
Where: West Avenue and 13th Street, Ocean City, NJ
Order: 12-inch Piccini Special (fresh spinach and basil, San Marzano tomatoes, blend of mozzarella and mild provolone cheeses on a garlic/olive oil base), 12-inch Sharp Provolone and Broccoli Rabe (self-explanatory, right? also with roasted red peppers on a garlic/olive oil base), eight-inch red pie with mushrooms and bacon for the kids

Guy Fieri is a mixed bag in the world of food, a veritable John Cena figure in that some people love him and others despise him. Regardless, his show on Food Network, Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives remains a vital resource for anyone looking for great restaurants that aren't your normal chain fare or are high-fallutin' fine dining establishments. Not only is it a must-reference for eaters, both local and travelling, but the show is a boon for small businesses, perhaps the biggest success for those standalone establishments in these trying times. I've been to a few of these establishments, and not once has my meal been anything less than stellar. Triple D has a sterling track record.

Tuesday, February 7, 2017

You Can Has Cheezburger: A Semi-Definitive Tier Ranking of Burgers Across America

God bless you, cheeseburger, especially ye what hail from In N Out
Photo Credit: TH
The hamburger/cheeseburger has roots in German cuisine (look up the Hamburg steak), but the sandwich as mostly everyone knows it is an American invention. Whether you believe it was created in Texas or New Haven, CT or wherever, the burger is in the American Food Pantheon along with the hot dog and the apple pie. It's perhaps the most ubiquitous fast food in the country, whether in pure fast food places, mid-tier, quasi-sitdown joints, or as the "fast" or "cheap" option at a regular restaurant. So needless to say, America has an overabundance of burgers. Granted, everyone has their favorite local burger joint. Every town has a great place to get a piece of ground-up meat slapped inside a bun with cheese and possibly other toppings. However, some joints are nationwide or at least partially nationwide. I will attempt to rank the ones you can get in more than just a few locales.

Tuesday, November 15, 2016

The Food Power Poll: Thanksgiving Side Dishes

The king of Thanksgiving sides
Photo Credit: TH
Thanksgiving is one of my favorite holidays because it revolves around food. In unrelated news, I have no idea how I've gotten to be over 300 lbs. in weight. Oh well. Anyway, for most households, turkey is the main attraction, although some people may substitute ham, strip loin, goose, or some other protein. However, everyone knows that Thanksgiving is all about side dishes, as far as the eye can see. I will now rank the top ten side dishes in descending order. These rankings are final, and if you argue with them, I will kill you*:

Tuesday, May 10, 2016

TH Cooks: Creamed Chipped Beef

Call it SOS at your own peril; this stuff is GOOD
Photo Credit: TH
Creamed chipped beef is a staple if you're one of two people: military adjacent or a native of Pennsylvania. Its nickname, "shit on a shingle," is far from flattering. I don't know how well it usually gets made in army mess halls to get that name, but it's not a diner staple in the Philadelphia area because it tastes bad. When made right, creamed chipped beef is a hearty, creamy, delicious breakfast. In fact, it's like sawmill or country gravy, only with tangy, salty beef in it. You can also put it on nearly anything: toast, home fries/hash browns, waffles, or my personal favorite, donuts. However, the biscuit is probably the most appropriate means of conveyance.

Thursday, April 21, 2016

Jack's Delicatessen: Philadelphia, PA

The Chosen People know how to eat
Photo Credit: TH
What: Jack's Delicatessen
Where: 8500 Bustleton Avenue, Philadelphia, PA (northeast corner of intersection with Tustin Street)
Order: Jack's Special (Corned beef special) with Swiss cheese, onion rings

American Jewish people have quite the amazing spectrum of culinary offerings. One end contains things that I might generously called "acquired tastes." Gefilte fish and chopped liver, for examples, that I might need amazing amounts of coaxing - or alcohol - to even think about trying. But it's not all weird offal and seafood. In the hands of a seasoned bubby, roasted brisket is amazing. Matza ball soup has curative properties. Kugel works both as a savory side and a sweet dessert. Blintzes, latkes, various pastries... the Chosen People certainly know how to eat.